Monday, May 11, 2009

Batman, The Ride (Or Not)

OK, so I have my little tag of "Getting My Sexy Back" for working out, but it is time for me to come to grips with things. I've struggled with my weight for a long time starting with high school once I quit sports. In 2001 I went on the "Body For Life" program and followed it religiously. I finally decided to myself I wasn't going to worry if I was losing weight or not, I was just going to work out and improve my health. I decided I had enough and I wanted to live as long as I could.

I weighed 326 pounds.

After about seven weeks I was at a Cici's pizza on my free day stuffing myself with pizza and I ran into a buddy of mine's wife. I said hi and started talking to her but her mouth hung open the whole time and she wouldn't talk to me. I thought she was mad or something. Turns out, she didn't recognize me because I had lost so much weight.

I didn't notice, it just seemed to happen overnight that suddenly my clothes didn't fit anymore and I had to punch new holes in my belt to hold it up around my waist. People noticed and I was proud. I actually had a waitress double check another form of ID because she couldn't believe the guy on the front of the credit card was the same guy at her table.

I lost somewhere between 60 and 70 pounds and I slowly returned to normal eating, dropping off the program. Returned to my old eating habits. Started drinking soda again, getting more sporadic with my exercise.

One day I would up in the floor screaming in pain. Something in my abdomen was killing me. I though my appendix must have suddenly ruptured and I expected to die. THE WIFE finally convinced me to go to the hospital, but the pain just went away. One minute I thought I was going to die, the next minute, I was fine. No pain at all. I told her to go home. It was stupid to go sit in the ER and wait for a doctor to tell me they couldn't find anything.

I continued on my merry way and before long it happened again. This time when the pain quit on the way to the hospital, THE WIFE convinced me to go on. I was seen and had an ultrasound. The prognosis was gallstones and I needed to have my gallbladder out.

Surgery WAS NOT something I wanted but the doctors told me it was really the only option I had. There was no other effective treatment and the only real side effect would be diarrhea if I ate fatty foods.

The surgery itself wasn't too bad but I did wind up passing out beforehand. THE WIFE was asking about the blood sample they took prior to surgery. I told he the phlebotomist sucked as she kept moving the needle around. I then thought about it, got light headed. I remember THE WIFE telling me to sit down right before I went out.

I woke up on the floor hearing voices way off in the background talking. I remember thinking that I didn't remember the surgery at all and I couldn't figure out what was going on. THE WIFE explained I passed out and bashed my head into the wall. The Doctors then rushed me back to pre-op. (Turns out passing out is a great way to avoid sitting in a waiting room. Note for all you all.)

After the surgery I had to wait six weeks before working out again. At that point, I was out of the routine and could not get back on track.

The last time I went to the doctor (about three weeks ago) I weighed 322 pounds. I was kind of depressed, but I went with my family to Six Flags yesterday (THE WIFE is a roller coaster junkie). She asked me to ride "Batman The Ride" with her. I love the ride so we went and got in line with the oldest boy to ride up front, but I can't buckle the harness on it.

I am officially too fat to ride "Batman."

I don't know what to think. I keep "Planning" to work out. I have pretty much quit my carpooling because there was no way to workout while I did that. Now it's a matter of sucking it up and getting down to brass tacks.

I once again see an impossible task before me. Can I do it again? Can I go beyond where I am?

When I lost my weight I went from size 44 pants to size 38. I really really miss those size 38 pants. I only wore 36 in high school.

I am so depressed. Maybe I need to go eat some chocolate.

1 comment:

Miss Yvonne said...

Oh man, my husband is in the same boat as you right now. He told me his most depressing day was the day he had to squeeze into a booth at a restaurant and barely fit. Too bad we don't live closer to each other, y'all could be workout buddies.