Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas


And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

LUKE 2:8-14

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Holy Pimp-Slap Batman!

A picture is worth a thousand words.
A pimp-slap is a great equalizer!
Hope Santa is good to all!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Why Cameras Don't Always Work

This article Linked from Say Anything points out why even though it might be cheaper to run cameras, the chance for abuse is always there.

As a prank, students from local high schools have been taking advantage of the county's Speed Camera Program in order to exact revenge on people who they believe have wronged them in the past, including other students and even teachers.
Students from Richard Montgomery High School dubbed the prank the Speed Camera "Pimping" game, according to a parent of a student enrolled at one of the high schools.
Originating from Wootton High School, the parent said, students duplicate the license plates by printing plate numbers on glossy photo paper, using fonts from certain websites that "mimic" those on Maryland license plates. They tape the duplicate plate over the existing plate on the back of their car and purposefully speed through a speed camera, the parent said. The victim then receives a citation in the mail days later.
Students are even obtaining vehicles from their friends that are similar or identical to the make and model of the car owned by the targeted victim, according to the parent.

But what do I know right? Obviously if the camera catches you, you MUST be guilty. I wonder how long it will be before people use this to get rid of traffic camera tickets (which does not sound so terrible to me).

Adventures in Computing

Well, one of the mini-me children managed to get the VUNDO virus loaded on our home PC. THE WIFE and I are trying to remove it as I type this. What a pain.

For all of you who stumble across this nasty little bug, from another PC go to http://vundofix.atribune.org/">http://vundofix.atribune.org/, download the .exe and run it.

Scratch that, it didn't fix poop. Go download MALWAREBYTES at http://www.download.com/Malwarebytes-Anti-Malware/3000-8022_4-10804572.html as it actually does something.

Good luck.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

What I Want For Christmas



NO! NOT THE KING!


The Meaty Spray from Burger King called FLAME!

Thanks for the Head up Van.
DANGER! VAN HAS A POTTY MOUTH!!!! But dang he's funny!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

I Love Anne Hathaway

Genius. She is probably my third favorite lady. Immediately after THE WIFE and COLLEGEGIRL! (I am not counting my mom, she is in a different class of course.)


My Favorite Picture Ever!

Enjoy your time in Jail Erin!



Read all about it!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

I Admit It

OK, sorry. I know I am horrendously boring right now. The end of the year is upon us and we have a new load of software we are testing, MAJOR CUSTOMER is coming in next week to test the conversion to the new PHONECO PBX and everyone is (cough cough) sick. (NOT)

So it has been pretty busy. I have spent my time fighting to get a suitable amount of load testing so we can generate 40,000+ hourly call attempts to make sure there are no problems with our older cards in the new system.

Anyway... Still sorry. If anyone is still awake. Here is a funny picture for you.

Behold the power of METHANE! 
(Seriously, shouldn't the flame be blue?)

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Ghost Hunters Drama Still

Oh, well. I just couldn't enjoy the show this week. Too bad that one sloppy show ruined the whole thing for me.


Watch to the end of this one. The last 30 seconds makes the rehash of everything else worthwhile. I missed this myself.

Absolutely Nothing To See Here...

Sorry, my life is mind numbingly dull at this moment. The kids are too cute though.

Sadie and Lucie spent some quality time with Santa yesterday. Sadie, the ever shy two year old, dragged her outgoing 4 year old flirt of a sister up to Santa. Sadie then promptly plopped in his lap without a second thought and basically commandeered the kindly old elf until she was dang good and ready to leave.

Strange.

We also hit Christopher's orchestra concert last night. It does my heart good to see the boy rocking out on the upright bass like his old man. For the record, he didn't spin it like he does mine. His instructor did let us know he gets his spinning and sissor kicks out during rehearsal though.

Ahhhhh, to be young again.

Monday, December 01, 2008

Words of Wisdom

I am linking to an article by Vox Day at World Net Daily discussing the need to depend on ourselves for protection rather than government. I felt he summed it up nicely here:

The truth is that no one will protect you – not the police, not the part-time security guard, not the staff of whatever business you are patronizing and not the national armed forces. You must take responsibility for protecting yourself, and the only means to do that is to ensure that you are appropriately armed whenever you intend to go out in public regardless of what the local laws might say.

I don't always agree with Mr. Day, but I wholeheartedly do today. There is no person on this earth who cares more about your survival than YOU DO.

Read the article and think about it. What would you do, trapped with your children and no option to protect them and yourself except to hide and hope the authorities can stop the carnage. That is fine until you realize once you are discovered, you are powerless.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

I Feel Rather Goofy This Second

Been doing demolition around the house. This kind of sums up my inner kitty...


 funny pictures of cats with captions
more animals

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Disturbing Our Children After Our Demise

OK, so THE WIFE has a plan to be in our children's memory long after she is gone.

When she passes she has left instructions for me to have her ashes crushed into a diamond which we will then set into a ring. The ring will be given to our oldest son. We figure the conversation with his future bride will go like this:

Andrew: Will you marry me? (Holding out THE RING)

Future Wife: Oh yes Andrew!

Andrew: Here take this ring, it was my mother.

Future Wife: Oh how sweet! This was your mother's ring you say? How sweet!

Andrew: Uhhhhh. No, actually I said it WAS my mother.

Future Wife: EEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Wal Mart = Evil

They are just trying to tease us with this item. Do you see anything wrong here?

Friday, November 21, 2008

Darwin Was Wrong

So now that I am a lab rat, I do still occasionally get tech support emails. Sometimes it is from a tech trying to get me to bite on his fishing for me to jump into the fight and fix something.

Usually its not.

Usually it is the crack smoking dispatch department. "Don't be so tough on them," you say? Keep in mind I no longer work tech support, the guys I used to work tech support with were all disbanded and moved around the companies.

Yet Dispatch keeps emailing a dead email link. One where everyone's duties have now changed. Best of all is the last email stated the technician expected a "Callback within 30 minutes."

Yeah right. I hope she gets about 14 more calls from him waiting on someone to call him, then gets told she is sending a tech to nowhere land as she is escorted out of the building for being STUPID.

Kind of get the idea I hold them in low regard?

I Am Officially Ticked Off

I am saying this in my official status. Application X SUCKS.

I had to move the IP Address scheme to test Application Y. I think try to change the IP scheme back so I can try stuff on Application X and Application X WILL NOT WORK AGAIN!!!

This wouldn't bother me, but I keep getting asked questions on Application X (which we aren't even testing anymore as it was sent back to development) but I keep getting asked questions and people want to see it and

IT

DOESN'T

WORK

!!!!

In a side note, I just got filled in on all the politics I have to look forward to when I get moved back to Tech Support. I probably haven't mentioned I am almost certainly destined to get moved back.

Sigh... So long my sweet stress-free life.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Business Success

Two pet peeves I have.

1. Official business mailings, documents and emails with basic grammatical and spelling errors.

I am a high school graduate, I could not cut it in college but I can usually spell relatively well and in the cases I can't I leverage the tools modern technology has given us. I am astounded at the number of business communications I get which lack basic grammar and spelling which are written by COLLEGE GRADUATES.

2. Electronic communications using non universal distribution media.

If a company is going to send out mass mailings with "Important information on how to do XYZ," or "New sales incentives." It is a good idea to make sure the attached information can be read. Not everyone is using Office 2007 (I know it's a shock) so maybe you should use some converter to change it to a PDF or something easily read universally. It is easy to do a Google search for free PDF converters and find several.

OK, I feel better now.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Putting Our (Best???) Foot Forward

So I see an email floating around yesterday where someone is trying to explain to a tech he needs to use a Fully Qualified Domain Name for SIP registration. For those of you who aren't geeky, this means you use a name like "www.cnn.com" instead of an IP Address "157.166.255.19."

Nice. Simple. Not difficult to set up DNS to register to the PBX.

The tech then fires back an email that the customer will not be buying a DOMAIN CONTROLLER for this to work.

????

You don't need a Domain Controller I think. Just configure a DNS server. Any server will do, just add that functionality to it, make it the primary DNS server for the VLAN and set up an A Record and have everything else refer to the real DNS server you are using.

Obviously the tech thinks he needs to set up a Windows Domain to make this work.

Sigh... I go back to testing my widgets. Not my battle to fight.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Nice Weekend

This weekend Ben got to go to an outing to DFW airport to have tour of the Air Traffic Control Tower. A friend of his from Karate has a parent who works there and arranged for a group of special needs kids to get to visit the airport, speak with some of the controllers and see the tower in action.

It was amazing to see how the third busiest airport in the country routes aircraft in and out of it's 7 active (at any time) runways. I also did not realize DFW airport takes up roughly the same amount of land mass as Manhattan island in New York. We got to visit the West tower (DFW has three active towers to control traffic) and from there we could watch the taxiways, runways and watch the incoming and outgoing aircraft. The kids were treated to getting to watch a 747 take off and minutes later seeing another one land.

My hats off to the men and women who run that place and watch over our safety as wel travel. Thanks to all of you for letting our kids get a peek behind the scenes.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

It's The End Of The World As We Know It

Whyfore does a "Man" having a baby make the news?

Here is a flash just in from Tots For The Masses.

He's. A. Chick.

That's right folks, the woman plumbing is still in place. (S)He might have had something added to the old thingamajiggie, and some stuff removed, but bottom line is this is a WOMAN with a MAN's name.

I don't care how you feel about this, or if you think it is sick, revolutionary, an abomination or a revelation. A WOMAN having a baby is no big deal. The fact she is pretending to be a man is the only thing which is making this be newsworthy.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Fixing The Economy

Here is what Obama needs to fix the economy.
Everything can be fixed with a plunger.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Thank A Veteran

A sincere thank you to all veterans past and present. Thank you for keeping my family safe.

A special thank you to David my brother-in-law serving overseas in the Army right now.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Confusion For Some

Sorry, very poor cartoon on my whiteboard, but hey it's Monday. Apparently some guys around the lab didn't get the joke.


Does everyone else get the joke, or is it just me?

Thank You

I was just browsing around the web and realized I have made more of an impact than I thought. Sure I have 1.2 million blogs ranked ahead of me, but hey, I didn't even realize I had gotten tagged by Nikki and I didn't even know it.

Sorry Nikki.

Anyway, much love to all of you who have been sticking with me through the humor vacume over the last little bit. I promise to start taking lunches and sharing random stupid crap I do to my friends and co-workers.

Jerry, that means you. You are NOT safe.

MUWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Friday, November 07, 2008

Announcement

Folks, this is aimed at the people who travel abroad and are now stating they don't have to be ashamed to be recognized as an American when they travel abroad now that Obama has been elected.

I don't care where you are on the political spectrum, what your rational was for being ashamed or whatever. Do use all a favor and STAY ABROAD.

America is a great country. If you are ashamed of being an American, I am ashamed to have you as a fellow American.

No one agrees with all of our policies. NO ONE. But I am an American and will be as long as it is a free society.

People need to learn when you hug a Frenchman, his stink rubs off on you.

OOOOOOGAH!!!!

At my former employer PHONECO (I will try to come up with some new name to call where I work now since technically it is a different company) since no one EVER turned lose of cash and they NEVER seemed to make their numbers mediocrity was rewarded with promotion. So in essence the company winds up with 300 million VPs, GMs, Directors and Supervisors over about 12 workers.

Which leads to the joke from the dinner table last night...

What is the difference between a film school movie and PHONECO?

A film school movie only has ONE director!

Badum CHI!

Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all wekk, be sure to tip your waitress.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

I Am So Disappointed

OK, folks. I have been a fan of the SciFi series Ghosthunters ever since it came on the air. It is with a heavy heart I must make the following announcement.

I think the Halloween show was a load of crap.

This hurts, but the whole Jacket tug thing, is faked. It is apparent Grant is manipulating the hood of his jacket with some kind of string, wire, garden weasel, lawn mower or whatever.

I give you the following clip.



Notice Grant's right hand NEVER comes away from his side the three times his hood is tugged on. If you look closely you will also see it is positioned right at the bottom of his jacket.

I am really REALLY upset about this.

Also, as much as I would like to believe, I just happen to have a voice changer which can perfectly replicate the EVP in the following clip.



Dang it guys. I loved the show so much. Now I will NEVER be able to watch it believe anything. These are guys (and girls) I had come to really think I knew.

I don't think they are bad people, but I think they got pressured to make stuff "Happen."

Oh well, that's TV for you.

Justin Is A Genius

Funny pic by my buddy Justin. Got to laugh.

funny pictures
moar funny pictures


Thanks Justin.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Congratulations

I want to offer my sincere congratulations to the Democratic party. I hope you all can turn the economy around the way you all really believe you can.

Please keep our country safe and PLEASE remember that just because we make people follow rules to get into this country, it DOES NOT make us racist.

For our children's sake, do the right thing.

Monday, November 03, 2008

Halloween

Well this Halloween we did the house up with a graveyard, some flashing lights, noises and various other things. Chris wasn't feeling so good so he and I were handing out candy and watching Ghost Hunters live. I was really impressed with one clip where they caught a voice saying "You aren't supposed to be here." The guys posted it on one of their myspace pages. Since they were cool enough to YouTube it, I wanted to put it on here so you all could see it.

Sunday, November 02, 2008

Guitar Hero



After watching the above commercial my son Chris said "So all those guys sit around playing Guitar Hero together?" I told him, "The commercial was based off of an old Tom Cruise movie."

His response?

"Tom Cruise made a movie about playing Guitar Hero?"

Friday, October 31, 2008

Home With THE WIFE

THE WIFE is feeling ill today so I am burning a sick day and staying home with her. She is on the phone so I am running to the computer to feed my online addiction.

I am plotting what to do for Halloween. I figure a big fat guy in a mask running at a kid with a weed wacker or something will scare the crap out of the little rugrats. We'll see. The front yard is a graveyard again (literally). It isn't so bad except for when Google Maps did their "Street View," we have a graveyard in our front yard.

Check it out!


Note the gravestones!


So anyway, some confusion.

Also, on a side note, some folks have asked THE WIFE why there is no link to her blog anymore. She has decided not to blog anymore because she doesn't care for everyone in the universe peeking in on her thoughts. Unfortunately I don't generate much traffic outside friends and family but I do get the occasional WACKO who does a drive by. So if you wish to know what is up with THE WIFE, you will have to contact her directly.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Return Of Darth Tater

OK, sorry. I am back.

Things have been very busy at work and all in all I have been pretty happy. That doesn't make for much Blog-Fodder and the lack sarcasm fuel makes it difficult to write in a properly snarky manner.

So, I guess I must share my joys. I am grateful for my wife and family, my friends, my job, my country and my God. I am blessed beyond what I deserve. My job is like what I had originally signed on for. I am given a task and I am expected to perform it. I don't have to play politics, I don't have to deal with people screaming that I didn't help babysit their tech enough and or properly. I don't have to get up and argue with people who have no desire to learn.

I just got back from our quarterly meeting where we were shown the results of the first half. For the first time in a long time, the chart shows us in the black (as compared with my OLD company which was always either just squeaking by, or in the red). I even heard the word "Bonus" mentioned. Our company leaders talked about "Products" and encouraged us to "Think about how we can show the customer value for what they are spending money on." This is wicked crazy compared with the old meetings where we heard how we were going to "Attack the vertical markets," and we "Don't sell products, we need to provide solutions."

It is nice to work for the PHONECO I remember.

P.S.

Don't worry, something will get my shorts in a twist before long and I'll go off on a tear before you know it.

Monday, October 27, 2008

I WIN

Just to prove THE WIFE and I are right to our 17 year old son. Please note the line "I am Iron Man" in the Black Sabbath song linked below.

It is the very first line in the song. We cannot help it if no one else knows how to sing.

Friday, October 24, 2008

I Can See Clearly Now The Hair Is Gone

Well, the latest installment in the ongoing adventures with Benjamen occurred last night. Ben was working on his homework (he was having an OK day, not the best, not the worst). For whatever reason, he was annoyed by his hair getting in his eyes so he took a pair of safety scissors with about a two inch blade and "Trimmed" his bangs.

It's a little uneven. I am sure THE WIFE will have some pictures.

I never knew the excitement we would have with kids.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Terminator


OK, I am hooked. I have to give it to Shirley Manson for her role in "Terminator, the Sarah Conner Chronicles," she has managed to creep me out.

Shirley was the frontwoman for the band "Garbage" for years and beyond being a heck of a good singer (as well as someone I would secretly LOVE to play bass for... hint hint) she is proving she can act too.

You would think acting like a robot wouldn't be very hard, EXCEPT for she plays a terminator who has taken the place of a corporate executive. This executive also happens to have a daughter. Shirley managed to creep the crap out of me watching this little girl who knows something is "Wrong" with her mom but not knowing what. Shirley managed to emphasize this and make you genuinely worry about the welfare of this little girl as the terminator tries to figure out what to do to make the little girl calm so she doesn't blow her cover.

All in all, excellent turn for a show that is turning out to be a lot more in depth than just a shoot-em-up thirller.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Good Weekend!

OK, so the Cowboys lost (suck eggs Jerry, thanks for trading away the future you doofus) but while Jerry Jones may NOT HAVE LEARNED ANYTHING FROM PARCELLS, Chris had a great game on Sunday. Andrew went with us to make his once-a-season baseball game visit and got to see not only the Red Legs smash the opposing Yankees 11-4, but Chris hit a BEAUTIFUL 200+ foot triple.

Man I HOPE his slump is over... the mopey-mopey kid was killing me.

I took a sick day because of everyone's allergies and my freakin' horrible back pain today. Surprise to us when Chris comes in and tell us he was having a bad day until Orchestra when his teacher told him he should try out for the Philharmonic (the next level of orchestra).

Chris was pumped out of his mind since he has only been playing bass a few weeks. We got the pin-striping tape from Auto Zone and we taped up the bass.

Boy is actually upstairs practicing. Thank you God. Thank you so much.

Oh, and last but not least, THE WIFE and I did early voting today. Mark up two for our candidates. If you live in Lewisville, Texas be prepared for a heckofa wait. We were there for over an hour and a half on the first day of early voting. I don't exprect lines to get any shorter.

Friday, October 17, 2008

What A Load Of Hooie!

OK I think most everyone has heard of Joe the plumber and gotten to see some of the attacks against him.

Apparently no one actually listens to what he said...

He said he was looking to BUY a business which earns $250,000 or more dollars a year. HE DOES NOT EARN $250,000 dollars a year, THE BUSINESS would be making it. So the taxes from THE BUSINESS would cause him to pay higher taxes under Barack Obama's plan.

Obama agreed he would pay higher taxes.

Dragging out Joe the Plumber's history is a non-issue folks and I hope most people see it for what it is, a calculated diversion from the FACTS.

Face it, Obama said Joe would pay more taxes under him (Obama) if he (Joe) bought the business.

END OF STORY!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Makes Me Want To Puke

Just because I got tired of trying to remember my password, I will take my griping here.

Eric's ex-wife got a powder puff interview and while the reporter openly admits she is pretty much just editing Erin's words, it still makes me sick.

You can read the piece of crap here.

My thoughts are, we heard this story before. It was the one the prosecution tried to use to send Eric to jail for murder one.

I know Eric and his family. I also am not aware of this "Crossbow" arrest in the early 90's. Eric is human as we all are and no one who is his friend is going to say he is perfect, but this whole article has already been refuted by the testimony in court.

Take whatever side you will, but THINK people. The only reason Erin is speaking out is because she got caught with the boys, the fact that she denied Eric any contact with his children should bring the first bit of doubt to your mind. As far as her kids being afraid of Eric, jeeze, I wonder what SHE told THEM about ERIC?

I also find it amazing she is all for an open marriage, but when Eric supposedly tells her he is thinking of getting involved with her friend, that's not cool to her.

Also, as far as being glad to hear HER side of the story, well if she hadn't run both before and during the trial, you might have had a chance. Seems like she would have wanted to make sure the "Truth" came out, but I guess not since she never testified.

Of course, she would have been cross examined and had her lies exposed.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Good News For Ben

Well I am pleased to say all the pain we went through last year has paid off. Ben brought home all A's on this report card. In addition he also has an "Excellent" in "Respectful" on his behavior.

Wow, hard to believe the "Teacher with 22 years of experience" had so much trouble with him.

I know it isn't right to hold such hatred anger a strong dislike for his old teacher. I should share in our joy. I believe I will fax a copy of his report card to the principal, the old witch his old teacher and the doctors associated with LISD.

Perhaps LISD should look a little more closely into what the problem was last year. I really wish they would, before it happens to another kid.

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Texas In The Fall

I can't think of any place nicer on earth than Texas when fall finally arrives.

I am outside Ben's karate class enjoying a crisp, cool breeze.

This is the life.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Answered Prayers

I talked to my mom who let me know Eric's kids have been found. The story is here.

Thank you for all your prayers and concern. Coming up Wednesday is a custody hearing. Pray for the kids and Eric during this time. God's will shall prevail.

I hope Eric and his kids can now finally have some peace and begin healing from this terrible accident.

My Back

OK, so this morning I am on 600mg of Aleve, 800 mg of Ibuprofin, 1000 mg of tylenol and 5 mg of vicoden.

My back STILL hurts.

Friday, October 03, 2008

Been Wokin' 9 to 5, What A Way To Make A Livin'

OK, I am tired. Worn out and last night was a night just filled with weird dreams. One of those where you don't remember everything, but you know it was strange.

Ben was all kinds of out of sorts last night and he was driving me nuts. Argumentative, rude, not wanting to do his work. I am sad to say this but it was one of the few times when bedtime for him was a blessing.

All in all the new job is great. They give me a task, I do the task, everyone is happy. I also realized last night watching the VP debate why I will never be able to be a politician. I am the kind of person who fixes something. If it is broken and needs to be fixed I lack the delicate way of phrasing things to make everyone happy about the matter.

In short, people would hate me.

So anyway. I shall grind away during the day today.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Set List Suggestions

I may get to play some acoustic shows with a buddy of mine. I am pretty jazzed about it because I haven't had a chance to break out the upright bass in a while. Here is the thing, I am looking for suggestions for songs to play. Especially some which are not conventional acoustic songs. An example is I would love to work up an acoustic version of something ridiculous like "Bad" or "Have a Cigar."

Of course if I do "Have a Cigar" I have to convince Mike to do the Primus cover of it so we can throw in the reference to "Bob Cock and the Yellow Sock."

Comment or email me suggestions.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Mister Mechanic's Great Adventure

I am home fighting a problem with the engine in our van today. Called into work and let my boss in on the bad news, he was understanding (thanks boss). As far as working on the van, all I can say is AutoZone will get my money from here on out.

The engine was missing and generally running rough and the "Service Engine Soon" idiot light was on. AutoZone came out and printed out the code breakouts while I waited. Checked for parts availability etc.. NICE.

Codes indicated misfiring on cylinder number 4 as well as a problem reported from the Knock Sensor. I did a little bit of googling of the problem and most likely fixes. I have now performed a tune up (plugs, plug wires, distributor cap and rotary button) as well as added fuel injector cleaner.

Still missing but it seems MUCH better. Most of the internet agrees the Knock sensor is a by product of the miss and not the other was round (thank God because the Knock Sensor is $130 and you have to take the intake off the engine to get to it.

So since I am away from the computer, I leave this bit of musical theft for you to mull over.

First up Pink, "You and Your Hand"...(I refuse to do the stupid spelling).



Now, The Veronicas, "Forever"



Oops...

Cracked Hits It Again!


So what if the presidential campaign was aimed at 6 year olds?

Or me?




I am soooooo ready to Vote! COME ON NOVEMBER!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Tracking My Time

So how do I account for time spent going to training, waiting on someone to show who never does only to find Jerkus Maximus rescheduled everything but sent no one notification?

I Couldn't Make This Stuff Up

So I just got an email from my OLD job's ticket system letting me know I have been assigned to a Service Order.

OK...

Funny thing is, I don't work there anymore, SO that means they will have a considerable delay in THEIR issue getting resolved.

BTW. I was called directly and asked for support on a hotel. Tech support is no longer my job, but I wanted to be a nice guy and help out the support guys so they didn't get bombarded. Spent a couple of hours trying out things and figuring out what was wrong. Call the guy back this morning, tell him how to fix it. He says "Thanks, I'll call you back and let you know how it turned out."

Hmmmm. No callback as of yet. Man, I thought it was URGENT! Maybe I was wrong?

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

How Does It Work?

For some reason this was funny around the office...

The Strange Things That Pop Into My Head

I wake up this morning with the following dialog in my head...

Dude 1 (sniffing a jar of Jam):"Mmmmmm. Nice, good aroma."
Dude 2: "HA! So what are you, some kind of Jam connoisseur?"
Dude 1:"No, actually it is quite simple smell this and tell me what you smell."
Dude 2 (sniffs the jar): "OK. Blackberries."
Dude 1:"Go on... You are getting there."
Dude 2:"Uhhhhh. Smells sweet, juicy, delicious."
Dude 1: "Very good. Now, try this one."
Dude 2 (sniffs the jar): "WOAH! Dude! That smells like poop!"
Dude 1: "Exactly, so don't eat it."

I think I need a vacation...

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Dead On

Too stinking funny. A buddy of mine sent me the link and I had to watch it again and again.


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Lab Rat Mission

My current task is to write up a document to upgrade from Product A to Product X. This seems simple enough, but DANGIT Product A has something squirrely in the database which Product X DOES NOT LIKE!

I think I can get it to work, but it looks like it will be a two step process. Load database from Product A MINUS files M, N and O, bring Product X online, then load the remaining files???

Crazy... Oh well, almost seven hours into the process and I am still trying to find out if I am right or not.

Friday, September 12, 2008

High Anxiety

I hate this.

Had a pretty bad anxiety attack today at the company outing. This one was really mild compared to my pre meds ones, but it just kept going and going.

My carpool guy was done eating and I was hoping to run, but of course he wanted to stay and do something.

So I go to the parking lot to escape the crowd and wait.

I wish I could be normal.

Oops...

I was having a conversation with a buddy of mine yesterday. It went something like this.

(The names have been changed to protect those who must not be named.)

Me: "So, what's happening?"
Buddy: "Not Much. Amanda Hugginkiss asked me to work on Project X."
Me: "Really? Cool. I heard Joe Shmoe was hired to work on Project X also."
Buddy: "Really?"
Me: "Yeah, he starts next week."
Buddy: "I'm glad you told me that. I don't want to work with him so I'll tell them I'm not interested."
Me: "... Uh oh."

So if a VP named Amanda Hugginkiss is really mad that I killed her chances for getting my buddy on board for Project X, I may be trying to get on with Laurence's company.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Eric's Jury Verdict - Reckless Homicide


We have all been sweating it out and worried sick over this but finally the first stage is over. Eric's Jury returned a guilty verdict of Reckless Homicide. This means they found him NOT GUILTY on Murder 1, Murder 2 and Voluntary Manslughter. Knowing Eric and hearing what happened, I completely and totally believed him, but we were concerned a Jury wouldn't.

Looks like his sentencing will be in October November. I don't want to celebrate because Sean Powell is still dead and he will never come back, but I thank God this wasn't trurned into a further tragedy by sending Eric to jail for life for a tragic accident. I repeat AN ACCIDENT!

Read about the story here at knoxnews.com.

Now, Eric and his family can move on to finding Eric's children and making sure THEY are OK.

System Enhancement

Actual email I saw today...

"...are you working on a patch so that we will not see these problems in the event of improper programming?"

???



I don't know how to respond to that.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

What To Say?

I haven't written much this week (or last week). I have actually been fairly busy with the new job. So far I am extremely happy. I have spent quite a bit of time wrapping up work from my old job, but the light at the end of the tunnel is there.

Eric's trial has gone to the jury. THE WIFE and I have followed it as close as we could and talked quite a bit with Eric's dad. I just want them to know we care (and I hope I haven't been a nuisance rather than a help).

So we wait.

Other than that I want to share an observation from a Lab Rat. I wasn't planning to trying anything, but an old friend told me she had read my blog and it had made her laugh.

I enjoy making people laugh. There is too much to be angry/sad/upset about. I would like to provide a little relief for my tens of readers.

So anyway... The observation. I am on a conference call with my boss, several people from my old company, a big wig from my old company and the customer. The customer is talking about how this particular problem they are having isn't a big deal, etc... My boss looks at me and says, "We are going to have to correct this." I agree so I, as politically as I can, explain that the situation is OK for now, but we definitely don't want it to get any worse as the particular problem they are having could crash the phone system if it got worse.

There is some more discussion and the conversation ends. I then get a call from the big wig who is trying to explain why he kind of talked over me (I honestly hadn't noticed). Turns out they are trying to make the situation seem better than it is. I pointed out I just wanted to make sure the customer wasn't completely caught by surprise IF the phone system crashed.

So anyway, nice to know I am still stepping on toes everywhere I go.

GET OUT YOUR DANCING SHOES BABY!!!!

Saturday, September 06, 2008

Maybe I Should Read Instead?

You know, I have looked back over some of my incoherent ramblings when emotion has struck me to action and I have attempted to write thought provoking and emotional posts.

Further study indicates I suck at long writing... Stick to potty humor and innuendo.

Specific examples of this malady are when I attempted to convey outrage at Eric's situation.I must get in the habit of writing my post out when I am caught up in the moment and the EDITING them prior to posting. Feeling passionately about something doesn't come across if the argument doesn't make sense outside your head.

This is why when I try to write real stories (other than 100 word ones) I wind up HATING them so badly I scrap the project rather than doing a decent editing job to make sense of the mess. Oh well, live and learn. That is my whole point behind blogging, to increase my writing skillset.

The Trial Begins

I have kept pretty quiet on Eric's situation (for those of you not in the know I have known Eric McLean for about 20 years), partly because I don't want anyone to think I am cashing in on knowing Eric and trying to weasel 15 minutes of fame out of this, but mostly because I didn't want to run the risk of hurting his trial. Fortunately since it is underway and the jury is sequestered I can gripe all I want now.

I have been watching what I can with THE WIFE on Eric's trial. It's hard being 800 miles away when someone you care about is going through so much but at least THE WIFE has recorded the In Session coverage on our DVR so we could watch it together.

At last it makes sense. Eric's and his Dad had told us she was threatening to take the kids. Once Bruce Poston (Eric's lawyer) ran through Eric holding the rifle, begging Sean Powell not to take his kids and Powell telling him he would "shove that rifle up his XXX," and "In two weeks they'll be calling me daddy," I finally understood. THE WIFE and I knew there HAD to be a trigger to set him off, but we didn't know what it was. (We have intentionally NOT asked anything in depth about what happened so that no information would be inadvertently leaked or overheard).

Now the question is, will the jury understand it really is all about the kids. Eric couldn't stand up to Erin because he though he HAD to have her to survive, but when he faced losing Eric Jr. and Ian he stood up to Sean. He felt cornered and reacted in the heat of the moment. The kids are the trigger and that is the mistake Sean Powell made that cost him his life.

Keep his kids in your prayers as their whereabouts are STILL unknown.

Friday, September 05, 2008

Paging Doctor Feelgood

Ahhhhhh, the sweet smell of stupid in the morning.

One of the guys around the office here has a PHD from some fly-by-night university and loves to flaunt it. For some reason upper management falls all over him and thinks he is almost as powerful as Obama or something (sarcasm) but I am less than impressed (maybe it's because I am uneducated and therefore fail to grasp the power of higher thinking).

Or maybe it's because he just sent out a notification letter to all our resllers talking about a change in policy. This is normal, what isn't normal is the second page is COMPLELY BLANK for some reason.

Actually it is kind of normal. Amazingly here at PHONECO we send out lots of announcements with grammatical errors, misspellings etc... Proofreading is obviously for the lesser educated.

If only they could figure out why Microsoft Word keeps underlining those dang words!

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Jury Selection For Eric's Trial

THE WIFE told me jury selection for Eric's trial began today. I checked the news and Court TV is supposed to be covering the trial.

I don't think I can stand to watch. Too many people who don't REALLY know Eric talking about his motivations and what went through his head.

I haven't talked to Eric since early this summer (Sorry Eric, Norman, Tanya). I tried a couple of times and got his answering machine (voicemail?). I can only pray for his family and wish them strength right now.

Also some people have asked about the banner and if the kids have ever been found. The answer is no. Erin McClean (Myers) is still on the run with the kids and neither Eric nor his family has had any contact with the boys since she ran from Nashville.

If nothing else, pray for those poor boys who are caught up in this mess.

Oh My Aching Back!

My back has been killing me for the last couple of weeks. I am trying my best not to become a junkie to Hydrocodone (SP?) but it freakin' hurts.

On a side note, I am at work. Three days until I go upstairs (YEA ME!) and I have an observation. After ten years at PHONECO I finally got a seat NEAR a window. I have a low cube wall I can look over and see outside finally. The goober they stuck in the end cubicle who has a true window seat has closed the blinds.

WHY?

Why in the world would you stick a butt-hugger who doesn't want a view of the world in a window seat. This drives me nuts! All these guys who get window seats promptly close the blinds.

I may crack today. It will be my parting shot.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

BUSTED!!!

For years now Andrew has SWORN he went to Las Colinas elementary school with a kid who did the voice for Mojo Jojo from the Power Puff Girls. We told him over and over again we knew it wasn't a kid and we didn't believe him.

This weekend it came to a head and using the power of google, we found Roger L. Jackson. The voice of Mojo Jojo.


Looks a little older than 17 for some reason. Maybe he was held back.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Stealing From The Unstable Blogger Whole Stole From Others

Mine didn't turn out so well...




The Recipe For Houston Keys



3 parts Dumb
2 parts Annoying
1 part Cheesy
Splash of Odor


Throw out and start over!

Monday, August 25, 2008

Coming Home

I come home today. I am just about out-of-towned out.

Dayton is an OK town, Air Force Museum is UNBELIEVEABLE! I will have to post a few pics. Rental car is a new mustang so that is pretty nice (6 Cyclinder).

Ready to get home.

Coming Home

I come home today. I am just about out-of-towned out.

Dayton is an OK town, Air Force Museum is UNBELIEVEABLE! I will have to post a few pics. Rental car is a new mustang so that is pretty nice (6 Cyclinder).

Ready to get home.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Monday, August 18, 2008

Dallas Is Wierd

OK, so I see this on my weather updater...


I am so ashamed to be afraid of rain.

Danger - Pity Party Ahead

You know it really sucks to work hard and try to get ahead as a technical person. When you work hard and are dependable what happens is you get screwed over by management types.

Case in point, as you all know I am taking another job within PHONECO. This is a good thing as I am not happy with the way things are set up now which is way too much travel for the same amount of money I was making when I didn't have to travel all the time. I have to point out we have steadily had more and more shoved off on us for the same amount of money due to "Downsizing." We are bitter because there are lots of VPs, Directors and Managers getting promoted on a consistent basis while the geeks can't get a cost of living adjustment (but I digress). The bad thing about my new job is I am retaining some of the things I was assigned to anyway because now they will lack the resources to take care of what they have commited to when they had me on board. So basically they will subcontract out my new position to handle this old stuff.

WTF PEOPLE!!!!

So once I touch it, it's mine forever? I am THE ONLY PERSON at PHONECO who can do what I do.

ALABAMA people! I need to ask for an obscene amount of money because evidently I am the only person in the world who can hold this company together.

How much should I hit them up for?

Darwin Misses Again

OK, so we have all seen it where someone on a distribution list does a "Reply to all" and asks to be removed from the list instead of just "Reply." Today was extra special because the "Reply to all" person also requested a "Read receipt."

So now every time the hundreds of people on the distribution list reads the email, they will get a message.

Shouldn't these people have evolved out by now?

Friday, August 15, 2008

Customer Problem Solving

Customer is having problems out in the field, one of the troubleshooting steps is to eliminate lne appearances to verify they are not causing a problem. One of the guys I worked with told the customer, line appearances are OK, just to save that for the last troubleshooting step. Do everything else that was suggested before changing that.

Customer wants to know why to remove the line appearances if it is OK to have them.

Guy I work with explains the rules for line appearances and lets them know as long as those rules are met , it is OK to have the appearances.

Customer says, OK we will make sure the appearances follow the rules so they won't have to remove them for testing.

I am willing to bet CASH MONEY that they are breaking one of the rules and this is causing their problems. I cannot understand why people refuse to clear a problem that is causing me so much pain.

What Is Wrong With These People?

So anyway, here at PHONECO in the Training Center one of the PBXs I work on is being used to simulate a Central Office for trunks for a smaller PBX. It seems that every couple of months I get contacted to come over and reprogram the way the calls route through OUR PBX. This is because they keep having some other engineer go over and change programming periodically.

WHY???? (I scream into the night.)

Jeeze folks, we get it right, then you decide you want it changed, then you have someone else come in and program it and DO NOT document how it works now. THEN YOU FORGET WHAT YOU HAD CHANGED!!!!

Next comes the email that something needs to BE CHANGED RIGHT THIS MINUTE BECAUSE WE HAVE A CLASS NEXT WEEK!!!!!

Poor planning...

Keep Me Hanging On

I have never understood people who ask you to take care of something and then they want to keep you on the line while they think out loud.

Dude, you give me something to do, I jump on it to get it fixed. I don't want to listen to you sit on the phone and go "Uhhhhhhhhh..."

Hang up, let me go and I will get it fixed and call you back. Further conversation is meerly wasting time which is precious (not to mention billable). Once we make a quote that says I have X amount of time to do a job, I will get it done in X amount of time.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Open Letter To Spammers

First off, I am a happily married man. I am not interested in meeting "Singles in my area."

Secondly, I DEFINITELY DO NOT want to hook up with "Hot married women who are looking for a fling."

Do you people have any idea how much a divorce costs? Or that in Texas you can legally pack heat? I don't want to be shot.

No more spam please.

That is all.

Thank You

Thank you to everyone who has written to congratulate me on the new position (no Sam it is not THAT KIND of position, it's a JOB). I sincerely appreciate the thoughts, goodwill and prayers.

H

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

JOB UPDATE!

Just got word, I was made an offer for a position in the lab and I have accepted. Starting September 8th I will become a "Lab Rat."

Right now I have one more trip to attend to and then off to the lab.

Ahhhhh... Memories

Had a co-worker stop me in the bathroom to ask me a question on how to do something with our database in raw format. I think for a second and I give him the amswer I feel is correct.

He kind of beats around the bush and it is obvious he doesn't like my answer and is trying to figure the logic of the system out so he can verify what I told him.

I suggest he ask two other people (developers / programmers) to verify what I told him and we part ways.

The longer I thought about it, the more aggravated I became. Here is a guy who has no business dealing with raw data anyway, who understands a lot of the processes but is unclear on this one questioning me. What I found out I got by sitting down with an offline system and hacking and reverse-engineering the PBX. I asked questions and sometimes didn't believe what I was told, but it was usually because what I was told didn't match up with the logic I discovered in the programming and data.

I am very tempted to start telling people to go fly off and do what I did, invest the time to learn it yourself rather than asking a million stupid questions and wasting everyone's time by never implementing anything.

Oh well. I guess I should get over it.

BTW, still waiting on word for the job. I also forgot my backpack, so no workout today.

I Am Such A Good Husband

74
As a 1930s husband, I am
Superior

OK, Little Better This Morning

OK, sorry. I felt terrible yesterday afternoon. I have too much time twiddling my thumbs right now and I often find that I get grouchy if I am sitting with nothing to do. It is always better for me to be busy (but not frantic) at work.

I would watch the Olympics, but since it is in China I am semi-boycotting (not really vowing not to watch, I just don't care).

I am supposed to get an answer back on the job today. Wish me luck.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Not Much Happening

Sorry, not much going on right now.

We upgraded PHONECO's PBX to our new BETA system with much success and fanfare last Friday. Unfortunately lacing the cables and everything up aggravated my carpal tunnel and I had pain and numbness in both hands all weekend. Also I was out of it all weekend on pain killers for my back.

Good news is hands hurt much less today. Back is actually pretty good today (better than usual).

I am still waiting for word on the job. I am supposed to know something by tomorrow. We'll see.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

I'm Workin' Out

OK, so my back is SCREAMING today and my right foot is still hurting like all get out so I decided to roll on the stationary bike for today.

Did about 5 and 1/2 miles in 25 minutes and still worked up a pretty good sweat.

Pre-workout weight was 314. I have been rounding up to the nearest pound on my weight, so yesterday I was really like 314 and 3/4 but I said 315. Today I was 314 on the nose.

Now if the doggone breakfast tacos don't catch up with me...

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

August 5th Workout Report

I am posting this to try to shame myself into continuing to work out.

Yesterday, I walked/jogged/shuffled/crawled on the treadmill 1.33 miles in a 22 minute workout. Pre-workout weight was 316 pounds (EGAD! Unfortunately I did once weigh more, thank God I don't weigh that now).

Today I did 1.25 miles in a 22 minute workout. Pre-workout weight was 315 pounds.

Trying.

Working Away

Seems that I am back in the groove as I am helping tech support calls again. Still no word on my interview, I don't know how things went still. Everyone who said they were goig to ask is not getting back to me so I don't know what that means.

ICK.

So since I am not in tech support anymore my boss mentioned billing back the TAC center... Don't want to go there as far as how relationships could go. I understand his point since I am supposed to be a money maker now but wow.

I just can't get used to this way of thinking. I guess someone who is still in TAC will have to step up and fill my old spot if that is the case.

Friday, August 01, 2008

UGH

Well, the interview was... I don't know. The vibe wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible and I left not really knowing anything either way. I chalked my bad feelings up to nerves and tried to go on with my day.

Later I found out a good friend of mine put in for the same job (supposedly). My friend has his CCNA which I do not.

BINGO

Basically I think we are pretty even otherwise, but the CCNA puts him ahead of me in the shot for this job. So I am pretty depressed right now and not really in the mood to talk about the job or anything else.

I guess I will use the downtime I have (of course I am sure I won't have any more now) to start getting my Microsoft certs so I can move on. Oh well.

I know, I know, nothing has been decided yet... I just don't know. I just don't have any hope at this point.

World Events Pie Chart

song chart memes
more graph humor and song chart memes

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Me Playing The Racing Card

What is this about a Race card? I've got a Jeff Gordon card I can play. Right Justin?



I Have Mad Skillz

OK, so I bring this piece of evidence forward to prove just because I stink at Guitar Hero doesn't mean i have no worth as a musician.

I present to you Rush, playing Tom Sawyer by Rush on Rock Band. This was filmed backstage at the Colbert Report. They FAILED!



I am vindicated!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

I May Kill Soon

I have been working from home so the van is available for THE WIFE to drive. This is OK except for I AM GOING OUT OF MY MIND WITH BOREDOM.

But hey, better here than at work I guess.

This afternoon she took the kids out and had to run back by so Lucie could hit the potty. Christopher rang the doorbell obnoxiously because I couldn't hear him knock because I had headphones on watching "The Car" on Hulu. I let him in and told the dogs to be quiet as they were going nuts.

Chris thought it would be funny on his way out to ring the door bell obnoxiously several times. This was annoying as the dogs went crazy. What made it worse was I almost had the moron dogs quiet again when he ran back up to the door and rang the bell several times again.

I yelled a bad bad bad phrase.

He then thought it would be funny to send me a BUNCH of text messages to my phone so I have to stop what I am doing to see what the message is because it might be something from THE WIFE. But no...

So the dogs finally stopped barking except for Dozer who feels the need to yelp every time I feel my chest pains easing off. It is similar to a smoke detector that needs it's battery changed.

I am going to shove a "D" cell into a certain area of the dog if he does not keep quiet.

First Two Of The Twelve Steps

1. Admit you have a problem
2. Get a cat


cat
more cat pictures

Monday, July 28, 2008

More ALL

OK, sorry for being a nerd again, but hey, I am 36 and it's not every day someone who treated you as a decent human being when you were 17 as you followed him around acting like a total nerd reunites with his old band and plays in Japan.

They play tomorrow In Denver (Guess I will mist that one) and October 12th in Chicago (Will probably miss that one too).

Scott lives in Austin now and Stephen lives in Tulsa. Since I live in the middle of them, I wonder if I can convince them to split the difference and play Dallas?

Just wondering... Anyway, for your entertainment, ALL in japan on July 26th. Thank you Melissa Reynolds for the video.



Another Day

Well, to let everyone know, I have applied for another organization within PHONE CO. My boss has been made aware of it, so all is neat and orderly and I am just waiting. Everyone seems to think I am going to get this job so i don't want to speculate on it.

Basically I would either go back to tech support or become a lab rat. Either one would be OK. I just can't travel like my current job expects me to. When you have a two year old, a three year old, a nine year old, eleven year old and a seventeen year old, life is pretty busy and I can't let my wife get buried under the workload. Other than the travel, my job is Ok and my bosses are great... just don't want to get divorced.

Anyone who cares to, prayers will be accepted.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

The Scariest Ad Ever

No WAY would I EVER watch this show. I remember this guy's last show!





Even worse... Look at his expression. I feel like such a piece of meat.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Which One Is The Real Me

A while back my in-laws saw a guy on TV who they felt looks surprisingly like me. So much so they called us and told us to flip over to FOX News to see this guy. Didn't catch it, but I did finally find a picture of him.





This is what I look like.





I have to admit, when I grow my hair out it is kind of scary. The guy's name is Kevin Miller and apparently he is a radio talk show host. Here is his Wikipedia Entry.



Mom, is there anything I need to know?

This Is Not My Kid

Despite what you may think, the boy who escaped from day care and went to Hooters is not my son.

Although, I am impressed.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

This Is So Stupid

I just hope COLLEGEGIRL doesn't try it out!

I found a date through zombie harmony - one of the best free dating sites for zombies
Created by Mingle2.com (Dating for non-zombies)

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

I Am A Prognosticator

A little while back I brought up that I had a dream that the band ALL was playing a show with my favorite singer Scott Reynolds. I thought this was weird as he left the band over ten years ago and ALL wasn't even really playing out anymore.



Then I saw THIS.



He's back. They got together in January 26th of this year and is playing with them in Riot Fest in Chicago in October. I also found out he is playing with them next week in Denver. Wow.



Let me check the Magic 8 Ball and see if there is a big raise in my future...





Dang IT!



Oh well. Here is ALL back in the day. Probably around the same time period I first saw them as a wide eyed 17 year old freak.





Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Warm Fuzzy Feelings

Sometimes I worry a lot about work and where I will wind up. This week however I am not worried in the least.

I twitted yesterday about the running rumor that got started about me jumping to another group and how funny it was. Thing is, people keep asking me if I am really going to jump over.

I also know of another opportunity I am going to look into which could be good. I also was stopped by a friend of mine who told me she thinks I need to jump ship.

Basically everyone who was moved in the re-org feels much more secure. Those of us left behind are seeing the same lack of leadership and confusing tangle of paperwork. Basically we (I guess you could think of us as "The Lost") are waiting to see if we get sold off, wacked (also known as laid off or RIFed(Reduction In Forced)), or dropped completely.

Funny thing is I lost one lead for a large corp because I failed to act, however I just got another request for an opportunity in Houston, TX if I want to move.

We shall see.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Look Out Laurence!

So Laurence twitters that the Houston meteorologists are in a panic about the possible hurricane coming their way.





Based on the damage from the last one, I don't think he has to worry.



Sunday, July 20, 2008

Just A Slip

So I got to play bass at a church the family and I have been attending for two weeks in a row. All in all, it's a fun gig with good people.

Today we were doing a song where one of the line's is, "Nobody like Jesus."

One of the ladies was asking to go back over a part and said, "Lets start from the line 'Nobody likes me Jesus.'"

Hilarity ensued.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Home Again And Back To Work

Hmmmmm.

Home again. Fortunately for me I survived the desert, now I only have to survive work.

While I was out of town I didn't take any painkillers with me and I had one bad mojo of a backache yesterday. Got home immediate ate one and slept like a baby last night.

Sorry for the lack of humor and postings. I will try to make it up later with some pics or something later.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Third Rule Of Andrewball

Ok, so I informed Andrew he was not making the rules on what the definition of "Water" was. He informed me that he was since there was a game of Andrewball going on. THE WIFE let him know she wasn't playing Andrewball as she had never played Andrewball.

The Third Rule of Andrewball is... If you have never played Andrewball, you don't exist.

So his mother doesn't exist, so he doesn't exist, so Andrewball doesn't exist, so none of us exist...

EEEEEEEKKKKKK!!!!!

Friday, July 11, 2008

Look Out Unstable Blogger!

Uh oh.



The Unstable Blogger and I were discussing finding Verne Troyer's house in Arlington and T.P.ing it.



I think he found out about it.




EEEEEEK!

Strange Dream

OK, so I don't remember a lot of my dreams, but it is even more rare that I remember one upon waking, but then retain memories of it as the morning goes on.

What else makes this unique is I dreamed I was at a concert to see a band that pretty much no longer exists. I dreamed I was out with the family at some kind of area like the "Old City" back home in Knoxville and I found out the band "ALL" was supposed to play. I was pretty excited because they hadn't played a concert in a few years now. The thing that was the big kicker is I could see them loading in and I found out they had their old singer Scott Reynolds back with them. This is even weirder because he left them back in the '90s and has been playing out on his own for years.

So anyway, like I did when I was a wide-eyed young musician who idolized someone I tracked down their bass player and tried to strike up a conversation. He immediately got really friendly and started showing me a picture of his pet which had just passed away (I don't know what that means, but I feel the need to point out he thought I was someone else which I unfortunately was too embarrassed to tell him I wasn't).

So anyway, I was keeping the whole family out late and the kids were falling asleep, so THE WIFE finally gave in and gave me 20 bucks to go see them play so she could leave.

Anyone want to weigh in and tell me what this dream means?

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Dead On My Feet

I worked support for an upgrade last night and I am beat. THE WIFE called to check on me and I let her know I was doing fine, but apparently she misunderstood when I was going out of town, so she thought I was only out the 15th. I let her know I would be gone Monday, Tuesday and return Wens...

Obviously she is not pleased with me as she is sure I said I would leave Tuesday.

The sad thing is I have no idea what I have said anymore. She tells me I have never told her things I could be sure I have.

Sometimes I think I am losing my mind.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

For Your Information

Just so everyone knows...

My gastrointestinal track has requested a day off. So I have graciously granted it in the hopes the revolt will cease.

Insanity will resume tomorrow.

Irony

Irony is:

Catching your son's dog eating cat poop, but having your son throw up afterward.

(sigh)

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Thinking Of Van

Poor Van of Furiousball who is sure life is out to get him. POTTY MOUTH WARNING!!!!



Life is not, but with friends like me...






Hang in there man. From another poor sucker with back problems...



But I don't make myself shovel mulch.

To Be Stupid Is To Is Stupid

So anyway while I play Lab Rat this week, a guy from another division comes up to my lab partner and says he is having problems with his PBX and needs her to upgrade his system to fix them (as a side note this is at 3 in the afternoon). He is getting a LOT of pressure and complaints and this has to be fixed now.

She says OK, she needs his database. He disappears for an hour or so and comes back with the database and drops it on her desk. We look and only half of it is there. She tells him she needs the whole thing. He disappears again. She calls him finally and he says, "Oh I'll get that for you in the morning."

!!!!

WTF, if it is so important, why wait?

So he winds up getting the database to her and same deal, half the database. She checks his system's drive and sure enough, he has SOMEHOW managed to delete HALF of his DATABASE!

Hmmmmm. I wonder if this could have anything to do with the problems he is having?

No cure for stupid.

Conversations With A Dweeb

Christopher and I were having a conversation over dinner which went something like this:

Chris: You know, I think fish were the originators of GPS.

Me: What?

Chris: Yeah, I think that is how they got around. They used their fish guts to find their way.

Me: That is crazy.

Chris: No, really. That is how we came up with GPS.

Me: No way. Using your thinking if I opened the GPS up it would be filled with fish guts. I know its not, so there.

Chris: How do you know? Did you open it up?

Me: Good point...

Monday, July 07, 2008

Yack And Hurl

I was going to post about a conversation I had with my son Chris and what a dweeb he is, but instead I am going to post about the Yack-Fest happening at my house.

It started last week with THE WIFE getting sick. Nasty bug, stomach cramps etc...

Then Ben yacked on the Fourth of July (not quite fireworks, but very colorful).

Chris went to stay at a friend's house on the 5th and we got a call in the middle of the night as he was redecorating their floors.

All finally seemed quite with Chris on the rebound last night.

This morning we found Ben had made some color modifications to his bed overnight.

(sigh)

Saturday, July 05, 2008

Happy Fourth Of July

Sorry it's a day late. I was enjoying festivities with the family.

Also we were enjoying the mariachi music provided by our neighbors... All.Day.Long.

Imagine 16 hours of THIS...



Oh yeah, happy birthday America, from your friendly Illegal Immigrant Hideout!

Thursday, July 03, 2008

The Difficulty In Chores

OK, so in keeping with our strange pets with strange habits (Nancy has an un-natural fear of paper, Boo is afraid of starving, Angel eats cat poop, Pepper the rabbit is an attack rabbit and Dozer is... well... Dozer).

Sato HAS to be the first to test out a freshly cleaned litter box. As soon as I begin cleaning it he runs from wherever he is in the house to observe my cleaning skills. he then climbs into the box and "Drops a Zag" while I am trying to work.

Very discouraging (not to mention disgusting).

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

New Song Lyrics

Slight modification of an old song.

THE WIFE (to Sadie): Bah bah black sheep have you any wool?

Sadie: NO!

So Confused

Good thing I am not tech support anymore. I am working from home because THE WIFE is very ill (probably food poisoning but if you would like details call me) and I am listening to my darling Lucie SCREAMING HER HEAD OFF because she wants to spend the day without clothes, living in her underwear only.

Stuff like this was awkward to explain when I had a tech with a major problem on the line. Fortunately for me right now I am waiting on a couple of Statement of Works to be sent down for me and another guy to look over. I don't have to worry about the phone until 2PM today.

Heck by then maybe I'll have a few beers in me... (Kidding, just kidding)

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

I Am Such A Geek

Your results:
You are Spider-Man
Spider-Man
85%
Robin
70%
Iron Man
70%
Superman
65%
Hulk
65%
Batman
40%
Supergirl
40%
The Flash
40%
Green Lantern
40%
Catwoman
35%
Wonder Woman
5%
You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.


Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

What The FISHSTICKS???

I normally try to avoid too much political blogging just because I know that no matter what I write, or how much I believe, I will not change hearts and minds.



THIS is just sick though!






Why is it progress in Iraq is written to appear as failure? Has the quagmire (giggidy) moved to Afghanistan? Why doesn't this spin positive and say troop deaths fall below those in Afghanistan for the second month?

Monday, June 30, 2008

Observations

OK, so POST-Disney I have some observations concerning Ben.

1. The boy is a Roller Coaster JUNKIE! Loves them. Space Mountain, Rock and Roller Coaster etc... BRING 'EM ON!

2. He is definitely showing stims like mad now. Hitting his head with his pillow. I have also noticed he is REALLY into being a gorilla at the moment (still way into being a cat as well). I wonder if once he has been at home for a while if he will ease off, or if this is a here to stay phase.

3. Ben is not thinking through options unless you walk him through the consequences. An example is I told him to stay downstairs at my Dad's house because THE WIFE and my step-mom were talking upstairs. Ben asked why and I said because "I said so." He looked at me, scowled and went upstairs. I got him, spanked him and he denied ever hearing me tell him not to go.

The next time he was choosing not to do something, I walked him through what would happen and he chose to do what he was told to do.

4. I am more tired now than I was before vacation.

5. I don't officially start my new job until tomorrow and I am already behind.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Not Happy

OK sorry to be a complainer. I am on vacation and I am using my blackberry as a bluetooth modem to access the web (crappy but better than blogging via blackberry, trust me).

I was really wanting to just have the re-org take place and get on with life, now the more I hear about my NEW job, the less happy I am.

I am sick and freakin' tired of busting my butt to get handed more responsibility and a hearty "Thank you" from the company. No more cash, more responsibility and now (from all accounts I hear) more travel.

I have five children and I am at the point where I am not very interested in traveling more. I don't want a divorce to be frank.

I was working tech support where at least I could usually be home after 5. Could occasionally work from the house (although for some reason management is terrified we won't actually work despite being able to monitor what we do at any point in the day). Travel had to happen occasionally, but not often. Word is now, the guys doing tech support will not be doing ANY traveling unless EVERYONE in my department is out.

Thanks... I don't want to seem non appreciative, but I am not. My Dad was on the road non stop for a long time and I saw firsthand what it did to my family. It takes a LOT of work to keep things together.

Good news is my headhunter is still interested, and after reading the job description, I am too. Possibility of working for a company with even more name recognition than the one I work for now (and I don't mean the fictitious PHONECO INC.), working from home providing support on a new computer.

Definitely interested at this point.